This is definitely not a kid's book. Little Wendy meets her new stepmom's pets. And she learns the differences between the two. And also their dark, dark secrets.
This Is Not A Kid's Book<br><br>Seriously, it's not. Lauren learns how to grieve her Grandpa's death at his funeral. And if you think, "Andrew, are you seriously making jokes about a little girl grieving death? What could you possibly do? " You'll have to read to find out.<br><br>This is not a kid's book. 18+ audiences only please.
Here's a great book to pick up for a quick laugh.<br><br>Convenience Store Diet was my comedy web comic for about five years. Every week, I'd make a new comic. And after making hundreds of them, I compiled a bunch of them into this "best of" book right here. It's all one-off, extremely inappropriate jokes that hopefully will make you laugh. Please enjoy responsibly.
This is not a kid's book. Or a life lesson. It's just some twisted humor about kids crossing a street.
Never show this book to your kids. But this will bring you back to the days when you were young, having a sleepover, and then one of your buddy breaks out a spoon, a lighter, and some methamphetamines, and scares the crap out of you and all your friends. Don't do meth please.
This is not a kid's book.<br><br>Don't do it. Don't open it if you're looking for a kid's book. Sure, it's about an older brother walking his little brother through his first day of school. But don't be fooled by the premise. And don't be fooled by the girl eating hard shell tacos with a fork.<br><br>Because this is not a kid's book. 18+ only plz.
This is not a kid's book.<br><br>Seriously. Don't show it to your kids. It's about a little kid who finds ways to make the most out of a rainy day. What does he do? Some pretty bad stuff.<br><br>Because this is not a kid's book. 18+ only plz.
This Is Not A Kid's Book<br><br>It's definitely not. Have you ever been afraid of the monsters in your bedroom?<br><br>Which monsters?<br><br>Probably not the ones in this book. Because this is not a kid's book. 18+ audiences only plz.
This Is Not A Kid's Book<br><br>Seriously, it's not. Joey wants you to meet his family! And if this was a kid's book, nobody in his family would be comically addicted to cocaine.<br><br>But then again, this is not a kid's book. 18+ audiences only please.
“Glow Up Morning” is your invitation to rise—not just from sleep, but into your full presence, power, and peace. With gentle affirmations and a voice infused with clarity and calm, this track sets the tone for a day rooted in joy, alignment, and ease.<br><br>Rather than pushing you into hustle mode, it welcomes you into a slower, deeper rhythm—where energy flows from stillness and your glow comes from within. Perfect for setting intentions, aligning your mindset, or simply starting your day with love and light.<br><br>This is more than a wake-up track—it’s a soul-centred morning ritual.<br><br><br>"The light is rising outside...<br>and inside you too.<br>A new day.<br>A new breath.<br>A new chance to shine."<br>
Pure Charisma – Track Description<br>“Pure Charisma” is a spoken-word spell of presence, power, and quiet magnetism. This track doesn’t beg for attention—it commands it, effortlessly. With hypnotic rhythm and rich, intentional vocal energy, it unlocks the truth that charisma isn’t about volume, looks, or performance… it’s about alignment. It’s about soul.<br><br>This is for the ones who move the room without trying. Who speak softly and leave echoes. Who carry the kind of fire that draws people in without burning out.<br><br>“Pure Charisma” reminds you that your power is already in you—you don’t have to fake it, chase it, or force it. Just be. That’s where the magic lives.<br><br><br>You’re not here to compete.<br>You’re here to be seen—without saying a word.<br><br>I don’t chase the shine — I am the glow,<br>Got that slow-burn magic head to toe.<br>I don’t shout, I don’t compete,<br>I just step — and the room finds the beat.<br><br><br>It’s in the sway, it’s in the gaze,<br>That quiet thunder wrapped in grace.<br>No need for crowns, no need to prove —<br>I speak in rhythm, and the crowd moves.<br><br><br>I’m the magnet in the room,<br>Pullin’ hearts with silent bloom.<br>No disguise, no smoke, no zoom —<br>Just me, baby — in full costume.<br>Call it charm, call it flame,<br>But I don’t play nobody’s game.<br>I just breathe, I just be —<br>And the world leans in to see.<br>
“Almost Said It” is an anthem for the unsent texts, the held-back truths, and the quiet ache of unspoken hearts. Blending intimate lyricism with emotionally charged vocal energy, this track speaks directly to those moments when fear silences authenticity—and dares you to break the pattern.<br><br>Through spoken-word soul and poetic affirmation, this track gently exposes the fear of rejection, not to shame it—but to outgrow it. It holds space for the trembling voice, the hidden truth, the yearning to be seen without shrinking. And in doing so, it becomes an invitation: to show up, speak out, and trust that your rawest self is the most lovable one.<br><br>This is healing for the throat chakra. A reckoning with shame. A call to courage.<br><br>Your voice matters—even if it shakes.<br>Speak it anyway. You’re ready now.<br><br>I write the words but don’t hit send,<br>Hold my truth like a note I bend.<br>What if I speak and they walk away?<br>So I smile instead, let silence stay.<br><br>I’ve rehearsed my soul a thousand times,<br>But still I freeze between the lines.<br>Afraid my heart’s too strange, too wide,<br>So I keep the best of me inside.<br>
“Unshakable Chill” is an anthem for the calm warrior—the soul who faces life’s storms with grace, presence, and quiet strength. Blending jazz-inspired rhythm with intentional vocal energy, this track helps anchor the listener into a deep state of grounded resilience.<br><br>Each line is crafted to realign your nervous system with your true inner power. As the affirmations sink in, the voice carries a frequency of confidence, encouraging you to stay rooted in peace—even when the world gets loud. It’s not about resisting the chaos, but flowing through it with steady breath and self-trust.<br><br>Whether you're navigating pressure, overwhelm, or simply need to reconnect with your calm core, “Unshakable Chill” reminds you of who you are: cool, calm, capable, and unshakable.<br><br>"You are steady like the ocean floor,<br>You’ve weathered storms and come back more.<br>Inside you lives a quiet fire—<br>Cool as the breeze, strong as desire."<br><br>I stay cool when the world gets loud,<br>I walk with peace through any crowd.<br>Calm in chaos, strong in still,<br>I bend, I breathe, I climb the hill.<br>
Sacred Body – Track Description<br>“Sacred Body” is a love letter to the vessel you live in—an unapologetic reclamation of every curve, scar, breath, and memory your body carries. With voice infused with devotion and poetic grace, this track helps listeners reconnect to the truth: your body is not a battleground. It is a temple. It is a testament.<br><br>This track dissolves shame, rewrites inherited stories, and offers a new rhythm—one where embodiment is not about appearance, but about presence. About owning your space. About remembering the divine intelligence etched in your skin.<br><br>It’s soft. It’s strong. It’s sacred.<br><br>You’re not here to shrink.<br>You’re here to shine through your skin.<br>This is your sacred body.<br>Sacred Body;<br>This skin I’m in, it holds the stars,<br>Wears every scar like sacred art.<br>These hands have prayed, these feet have roamed,<br>And still I rise — I’ve come back home.<br><br>This breath is fire, this heart, a drum,<br>My hips remember where I’m from.<br>Not here to shrink, not made to hide —<br>I walk this world in full, wide stride.<br>
Lionheart – Track Description<br>“Lionheart” is an anthem for the noble soul—the one who walks with quiet courage, fierce integrity, and love as their compass. This track embodies the Knight’s Mindset: a sacred blend of strength and softness, clarity and conviction, power and peace.<br><br>With steady rhythm and words laced in ancient code, “Lionheart” channels the energy of a modern-day warrior: grounded, self-led, and unshaken by the noise of the world. It’s not about winning battles—it’s about knowing who you are when no one is watching.<br><br>A soundtrack for those who move with purpose, live by principle, and carry the kind of strength that never needs to shout.<br><br>You don’t need a crown to walk with power.<br>You already wear armor of light.<br><br>Lionheart (Knight's Mindset);<br>I don’t fight for gold or fame,<br>I walk the path that holds my name.<br>In a world that bends, I stay upright —<br>Truth on my tongue, armor of light.<br><br>My shield is calm, my sword is grace,<br>I face the dark, don’t need to chase.<br>No crown, no throne, just soul and stance —<br>Each step I take is sacred dance.<br>
“Swagger in My Step” is your soundtrack for walking tall, speaking true, and shining from the inside out. With soulful rhythm and affirmations wrapped in warmth, this track helps anchor self-trust, confidence, and joy in the body—step by step, breath by breath.<br><br>Infused with loving, powerful vocal energy, each line activates your inner glow, dissolving doubt and inviting you to embody your worth. This isn’t hype—it’s healing. It’s a reclamation of your light and a celebration of who you’ve always been beneath the noise.<br><br>Let this track be your reminder:<br>You are bold.<br>You are bright.<br>You walk in grace—and with swagger.<br><br><br>"There’s a light inside of you,<br>Unshaken, steady, strong, and true.<br>And every breath, and every beat,<br>Brings you closer to your seat."<br>
